Monday, March 21, 2005

A Day in the Life of . . .

So I call up this one friend and he's not answering the cell so I figure he's busy working. Irritating but, hell, I suppose everyone needs to have a hobby or something and he probably enjoys doing whatever he does. Work's not such a big thing with me. I prefer to stay at home and mooch off my parents. It's a happier pastime than waking up every morning, scrubbing and bleeding yourself in that satanic ritual of getting ready for work and then hauling yourself off to some no-name office to consort with a bunch of busy-body losers all in the miserable hope of collecting a few pennies at the end of the day. I mean, who the hell would want to do that when you can stay at home and watch Oprah? Crazy people, I tell you.

So anyways, after I hang up on this guy, I call up another buddy of mine to get the four-one-one on our weekend plans. I love weekends. It's like, the whole week you stay at home and watch TV and then the big beautiful weekend rolls by and you have a reason to live again. The malls are brimming with loony teenagers, freshly released from the auguries of innocence and into the tumultuous world of hormones and other juvenile afflictions. They're quite a sight, these daft young fools, hand in sweaty hand, earnestly devoted in their pimply love for each other. It makes you wonder sometimes how we all managed to survive that terrible age, puberty, with all its scars and riddles, its vast arsenal of chemical torments, and still emerge unscathed and as fresh as newly driven snow. It must be one of the miracles of life. Or make-up perhaps. There's no end to the wonders a good apricot scrub can pull off.

So anyways, I call up this other buddy and he's not picking the phone up either and I'm like, what the hell! Is this like an epidemic of working sickness or something. I mean, what's wrong with you guys! Just because you have wives and children and bills to pay and mouths to feed, it doesn't mean you can't take a couple days off a week to have a good time. Or at least answer your phone. What's the point of it all, anyways? Why are you working so hard if you can't even enjoy the paltry fruit of your labours by kicking back and watching Oprah reruns? Is life really that bad that you have to sign your soul off to the corporate devil and stick your head in the meat grinder. These guys, I tell you. I wonder if the little puppies at the mall, these days found cloyed in love, will turn out to be worker slaves as well, chained and shackled to their matchbox cubicles, dismally eating last night's leftovers out of tupperware boxes with plastic spoons. The mere thought is enough to make you want to smother yourself in Belgian chocolate.

8 Comments:

Blogger DeOwl said...

Pimply love! So gross but so on target. :D

7:51 AM  
Blogger Waleed said...

I would like to blame the cellphone company at this point for their possible poor service that made you think and use your greycells.

dang you E$!^!@% !!

9:33 AM  
Blogger baj said...

van, the thought of belgian chocolate is enough to make me want to smother myself in belgian chocolate.

tew, what happened to yr doodleboard?

atharee, are you sure yr pals don't have caller ID and were deliberately shunning you? cuz that's what my friends do. ;)

1:09 PM  
Blogger Crazed Teacher said...

said like that it does make sense..what is a long weekend if not taking time out from life and watching opera and stuffing ones face :)with home made double fudge hot from the oven brownies

8:17 PM  
Blogger noodles said...

lol.

10:52 PM  
Blogger Knicq said...

Oh, that was you....the KK I am not-not-answering the calls from.
I am sorry bro...seriously, I am gonna save your number under kk+, and save it under secret handshake group. So when kk-not-+ calls...we play ring, ring...

Wanna call and try me again..?

- Guy who called back twice afterwards, makes a distinction between job and hobby, unlike other guy who mixes work and pleasure.

7:12 AM  
Blogger karrvakarela said...

Assalamualaikum,

Waleed: dude, you spelt it wrong. it's E$$!^!@%!!. Where did you go to school anyways? Choueifat, haina . . .

Baji: I'm not sure but I think it's died on me. Hasn't been working for the past few days. Maybe I ought to throw it out and get a new one.

Nadeem: yaara, maybe it would help if you gave me the right ringtone on your phone. So that the next time you hear the theme from Shaft play, you know it's your homeboy calling. *secret handshake waala icon*

2:02 PM  
Blogger Royalty Personified said...

MashaAllah, very articulate writing! :)

7:34 AM  

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